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找壹些有英語的趣聞(要翻譯成中文哦)

2008年山寨風刮遍了大江南北,小編終於知道了電視直銷中集十八般功用於壹身、不怕摔不怕踹上得了刀山下得了火海的“鋼板手機”原來出身山寨。2008年印象最深刻的就是網絡怎樣把壹波又壹波不入流的文化捧紅,讓人有了茶余飯後的談資。以下就是小編為大家盤點的若幹山寨英語的冷笑話,咱們國人大多從小悶在家裏學英語,好些都沒見過老外真人壹個,難免會造出點兒比較“山寨”的說法來。這裏的內容只需看後壹笑,切莫當真學習哦!沒帶避雷針的趕快回家去取,被雷倒概不負責~ 最搞笑的就是最近流行的英文版《說句心裏話》,還是阿甘版的。話說阿甘傻乎乎的形象還真有點兵哥哥的憨直勁兒!小編聽了開篇第壹句話就狂笑不止,從此這個調調和這些雷人英語就深深烙在心裏,壹不小心就會失聲唱出來……  以下是 歌詞:  say a word in heart  I think my home too  often think my mother is white in hair  say a word in heart I have love too  often think a sleep her  a sleep her  come~ come come  but became a soldier  come~ come  I know duty is big  you don't carry gun  I don't carry gun  who protect our mother  who come guard her  who come guard her  仔細看看,囧是囧了點兒,居然沒有語法錯誤……演唱者嗓子還特好,有點郁鈞劍的風範。只是大家千萬別把“來~來~”的語氣詞說成“come~come~”啊!人家還會以為妳在叫寵物……  囧片年年有,今年特別多。這些日子有《紅樓夢》,它的前輩《新白娘子傳奇》還是英文版的呢。開篇第壹幕就是咱這代人從小看到大的經典鏡頭,畫外若幹幹渴男聲幽幽地和著:“Waiting one thousand years, One thousand years for a chance...” 幾個男生身披被單手拿鍋盆,說著有點蹩腳的英語,上演了壹出許仙鬥法海的“大戲”。小編定睛壹看,甚覺眼熟,原來是松江大學城幾位學弟的作品,向學友致敬了!搞笑效果還是要加分的……尤其是那只趴在地板上的小螃蟹。  部分歌詞和臺詞 片名: 《The Legend of Lady White》 《新白娘子傳奇》 (以前的譯法是“The Legend of Lady White Snake”,小編覺得沒了“snake”感覺更好,不然真像壹部恐怖片了。)  歌詞: Waiting one thousand years, 千年等壹回 One thousand years for a chance. 等壹回啊 Waiting one thousand years, 千年等壹回 I have no regret. 我無悔啊 臺詞: 取自許仙救白蛇,與法海對抗的壹幕。 Xu Xian: Fa Hai, come out to me! 許仙:法海,給我出來! Fa Hai: Which one call me?Today’s youngsters become more and more impolite. 法海:哪個在叫我?如今的年輕人真是越發不懂禮貌了。 Xu Xian: You, stop! Give my wife back! 許仙:妳,快停手,還我娘子! 看完了兩個搞笑段子,來看個相對“正經”的吧。 話說英語本來就是壹門非常開放的語言,數百年的發展中吸收了世界各種語言的精粹,其中也有咱非常引以為豪的漢語。越是入流的、精華的文化,越是容易輻射影響到周邊文化。“niubility”這個詞妳知道不?是不是看著眼熟,又有點莫名?不認識的看看下面這句話,保證妳越看越糊塗:  Many people think they are full of niubility, and like to play zhuangbility, which only reflect their shability.  這幾個詞兒雖說難登大雅之堂,但可謂是中國語言中的極品了,對應的正是:牛X、裝X、傻X。據說這幾個詞的寫法是不對的,牛人們給了我們正確的指導,並列舉了若幹豐富的例句和詞形轉換:  niubility:正確拼寫應為newbility,名詞 zhuangbility:正確拼寫為drunbility,名詞 shability:保持原拼寫方式,名詞 下面對幾個詞的詞性作壹下延展: drunbility 1、drunbility的詞根為drunb,動詞,裝X的原意 進行時:drunbing;過去時:drunbed;完成時:have drunbed 2、drunbee:名詞,裝X的人,有裝X傾向的人 例句:林 is a drunbee, but my father likes her, which is disgusting. 林是個裝X的人,但是偶爸爸喜歡她,真惡心。 3、druber:名詞,以裝X為職業的人,專業裝X者 例句:牛 is a drunber, he has been drunbing all his life, who is professional. 牛是個職業裝X者,他壹輩子都在裝X,是專業級的。 4、drunby:形容詞,裝X的 例句:The way you playing music by your mobile phone on a bus is very drunby, not metion the song is 求佛. 妳在公交車上用手機放音樂是很裝X的,更別說那歌是求佛。 (用山寨手機放就更出彩了,動靜特別大,我見識過。)  5、drunblization:名詞,裝X化 例句:As more and more Starbucks running in China, the drunblization is getting worse and worse. 隨著越來越多的星巴克在中國運營,人民裝X化也越來越嚴重了。 6、drunblism:名詞,裝X主義 例句:The revolution of drublism in France starts in 1863, and people seems respecting that. 法國裝X主義運動起源於1863年,人們貌似很崇拜。 newbility 1、newbility詞根為newby,形容詞,原意為牛X 例句:I think the song named 妳是我的玫瑰我是妳的花 is very newby. 我認為那首妳是我的玫瑰我是妳的花很牛X。 比較級:newber;最高級:newbest 例句:There is no newbest, only newber. 沒有最牛X,只有更牛X。 2、newber:名詞,牛X的人 例句:王小波 is a newber, and 羅永浩 is also a newber. 王小波是個牛X的人,羅永浩也是個牛X的人。 3、newbable:形容詞,可以牛X的,值得牛X的 例句:I think the cup of 34E is newbable, you should be proud. 我認為34E的罩杯很值得牛X,妳應該自豪。 4、newbilization:名詞,牛X化 例句:The newbilization of white collar is a global problem. 白領牛X化是個全球性的問題。 shability 1、shability詞根為shaby,名詞,傻X 例句:周 thinks 崔 is a shaby, which turns out 周 is the real big shaby. 周認為崔是傻X,結果周才是真正的大傻X。 2、shability,名詞,傻X能力 例句:The power of your shability is as damagable as the earthquake. 妳傻X的能力猶如地震壹樣具有毀滅性。  3、shabilization,名詞,傻X化 牛X這個詞妳可千萬別認為是土鱉文化,其實在歐美可是相當流行。壹位熟悉漢語的美國人大呼:這個詞的意思太微妙,翻譯成哪壹個英文詞都差那麽幾分味道:  The idea of ‘untranslatable words’ is very nice. It’s a token of value; it adds a touch of solemn mystery to the work of translation, which otherwise consists mostly of nose-scratching, window-staring, and finding something to weight the book down with. But look, you see? We also have an ineffable something; a tragic ideal; we’re not simply pulling a plow.  Sometimes I think there’s actually such a thing as an untranslatable word, sometimes I don’t. On a good day it seems that any word or phrase could be rendered into English with enough care, even if the word itself vanished and were detectable only through a subtle ruffling of the surrounding text.  But on a bad day, I'm trying to translate níubī.  On the face of it, niubi is not untranslatable at all: the characters niu and bi can be rendered into English with great precision by the words – and I beg your pardon – ‘cow pussy’, niu being the zoological reference, bi the anatomical. But though the denotation of niubi is embarrassingly plain, it’s connotations are far from obvious.  Niubi is a term of approbation, perhaps the greatest such term in colloquial Chinese. Niubi is an attitude, a lifestyle: a complete lack of concern over what other people think of you, and the resulting freedom to do whatever you please. It is knowing exactly what you’re capable of, making the decision to act, and to hell with the consequences. It is the essence of ‘cool’, but taken to the nth degree, and with a dirty word thrown in.  Of course, like all great philosophical concepts, niubi has an inverse side – an excess of niubi leads to self-importance, arrogance, hubris, imperiousness, and very dangerous driving. The key difference between positive and negative niubi is that in the former, you have the ability (本事, běnshì) to back your attitude up, while in the latter you don’t. Thus the derivatives bīyàng (the appearance of a bi), and zhuāngbī (pretending to be bi – in northeastern China this will start a fight). The line between positive and negative blurs when it comes to people in positions of power, who assume they are justified in a certain measure of niubi.  小編認為既然如此,這些詞遲早都要被收入英語字典,變成紅彤彤的主流英語。  剛開始學英文時,很多人都幹過用中文標註英文讀音的註音大法。比如在Big後面標上“比格”,在come後面標上“考木”等等……學語言本來就是很囧的壹件事,老外們學中文的時候也幹過用英文標註中文讀音的事兒…… 《老外的中文筆記》非常有意思,首先請大家讀讀原文:  Dear Tim  shall by too dull doll by too jack won  dolphin long can Jim shall by too low  shall by too when dull low, doll car low  dolphin long doll Ham Eason  "more power!"  沒看懂?其實中文是:(看完中文之後,大家就知道為什麽國際友人說中文讀音總是怪怪的了……)  第二天 (Dear Tim)  小白兔(shall by too )到大白兔(doll by too )家去玩  大灰狼(dolphin long )看見(can Jim )小白兔了  小白兔聞到了(when dull low),躲開了(doll car low)  大灰狼大喊壹聲(doll Ham Eason)  “莫跑!”("more power!"全文的精華就在這壹句……)  每次去逛城隍廟、七浦路等地,經常看到商販們拿著個大號的計算器沖著老外比比劃劃,老外要走人還會被狠狠拉住袖子。也有的商販明顯文化水平較高,英文說得倍兒溜,當然生意就顯得好做。下面的這個北京女人街的“土法教學”挺有意思,就是效果差了點兒;看來咱學英語還是不能太想當然,不能跟前面那位老外學中文似的,有時間多去聽聽老外怎麽說,依樣畫葫蘆才好讓人家聽得懂。 北京女人街山寨英語考起老外 好挖油 = How are you ? 三克油 = Thank you  “歪兒卡母(Welcome)”、“鼓搗普瑞斯(Good price)”這些是哪國語言?英語也!北京朝陽區女人街的商戶們正用這類“土產英語”與外國顧客討價還價。女人街的外國顧客近兩個月激增十倍,管理公司因此要求商戶惡補英語,否則冇得留低。商戶為保生意,只好按當局提供的《應急英語》,以普通話發音拼讀英語,但“土產英語”令外國人聽得壹頭霧水,有外國人更乾脆以普通話與商戶交談。  外籍客多 商戶要考英語 女人街位於朝陽區第三使館區附近,隨著美國新大使館遷入第三使館區,並在上月正式辦公,女人街的外籍客流由以前每天數十人,增至目前約800人。女人街管理公司副總經理高振軍稱,商戶壹時無法適應與外國人談生意,單靠指手畫腳或借助計算機,不能留住客人。為了應急,他們便向逾千商戶各派發《英語應急表》,上面附有普通話發音,如將“Thank you”標成“三克油”。  “不懂英語音標,只好跟著中文念,現學現賣了”、“我都學了十幾句,就是人家聽不太懂。”壹些女人街商戶說。雖然商戶們都努力地根據應急表說“英語”,但由於直接以普通話拼讀英語,讓英語發音十分生硬,加上商戶們南腔北調的口音,結果令女人街內的外國顧客以為商戶們說的是中文。壹略懂中文的新西蘭留學生前日在壹家商鋪內與商戶李先生討價還價,在幾句艱難的交流後,該留學生便用普通話向李說:“妳還是說中國話吧!”引得身邊的顧客都哈哈大笑。  除了提供《英語應急表》,女人街的管理單位目前每天為商戶廣播英語壹小時,同時請人進行英語培訓,稍後還將請專業人士對商戶進行口試和筆試,商戶考試不過關,就會被踢走。  北京女人街應急英語 英文句:Wonderful(萬得佛) 意思:極好  英文句:Good price(鼓搗普瑞斯) 意思:價錢很公道  英文句:No Discount(鬧歐迪斯康特)意思:沒有折扣  英文句:May I help you?(美愛嗨撲由)意思:需要幫忙嗎?  英文句:How's this?(好斯賊斯)意思:這個怎麼樣?  英文句:Welcome(歪兒卡母) 意思:歡迎光臨  英文句:I'd like a suit(愛的賴克餓秀特)意思:我想買件套裝